JUST FOR TODAY

     Just for today,Lord, 
     Just for today;
     Help me have faith, Lord,
     Just for today.

Today should have been my son's 50th birthday.  He died of suicide almost 9 years ago.  Help me, Lord.  Something inside of me died with him then.

My life has gone on, of course.  I moved across the country twice, and retired and met new people and continued my journey of living.  In a few days I will be turning 70.  Help me have faith, Lord, just for today.

Others, Lord tell me to put it behind me and move on.  I thought I did, Lord. But here it is, his birth day, again.  I thought of my "baby" this morning.  Not the 41 year old he was when he died.  That was my first words after hearing of his death:  "My baby!"  Just for today, Lord, help me have faith.

Then, I remembered then the day we placed his ashes in the ground, and said prayers, and my baby was gone.  Faith, Lord, I need more faith.  

This morning I read your answer, Lord.  You said to me in Matthew 28:26,
"Surely, I am with you always.".   And, in Hebrews 11:1. "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."

Thank you, Lord.  I feel at peace, my faith is growing.  My loss is still real, but
I'm not alone.

Thanks!  Carol